The Right Way to Discourage Any Backchat from Kids

posted on Mar 09, 2021

Do the phrases “I will not do it!” “But why should I always do as you say,” etc., seem familiar to you? Does your kid revolt almost every time you instruct him/her around? Well, you are not alone in the battleground of parenthood. Most parents face the same challenge every day. Backchats, no matter how rude and insensible they may seem, exist in reality for most parents. And while knowing that plenty of other parents suffer the same dichotomy always neutralizes the pain to some extent, it does not make backchats from your little ones any less infuriating.

At Gurukul The School, we believe that no matter how rudely your child backtalks, finding the root cause can be a way to the solution. If you wish to treat a disease, you first need to detect what causes it. Similarly, if you wish to discourage your child from getting engaged in regular backchats, get to know the reasons why children act in such an unusual way.

When children grow up, they gradually become more conscious about their individual liberties. This is undoubtedly a positive sign of development. But, this can also be the reason for a few imbalances in behavior. As for backchats, not getting the amount of freedom or liberty your child expects or thinks he/she deserves can be one reason for the arrogant behavior. It is more of a “fight to flight” attitude than defiance. So what should you do about it? Well, we, at Gurukul The School, have a few suggestions for you to discourage your children from getting into backchats.

Allow your kids to choose for them

If freedom is the root cause of all the backchats, allowing your kids some liberties can be a straightforward solution to keep them away from such arrogant repercussions. For example, let your kids pick their clothes when they get ready for a picnic. Allowing your kids some power to choose their own actions can make them feel empowered and liberated. This will surely pacify their anger or sense of deprivation that develops in the absence of such allowances.

Don’t engage in a power struggle with your child

At Gurukul The School, we have seen that parents often get involved in power struggles with their kids unknowingly. When you think that you are simply advising your little one to protect him/her from probable harm they might get by following their individual way, they might feel suffocated or even dominated.

Our suggestion in such a case would be to adopt a proactive parenting approach instead of a traditional “don’t do” attitude. Children are always more amenable to suggestions and a tone of care and concern than command. If you would speak to them humbly without ignoring their individuality, they will find no reason to snub you.

Pay attention to your child’s needs

Every child’s needs are different. And as parents, you would definitely know the best about your child’s requirements. If you think you pay enough attention to your child just because you assist him/her in the home works or take them out for vacations from time to time, this might not be the complete package for them. Laugh with them, play peek-a-boo, read stories to them, and offer undivided attention (no phones, messages, or diversions). You need to ensure that your attention is adequate enough to nurture your kid’s body, soul, and mind. This can be a smart way to keep the backchats at bay.

At Gurukul The School, we understand that comprehending a child can be trying at times. However, if you have a good and friendly relationship with your kids, issues like backchats will probably not emerge at all. All that your child needs is your love, attention, support, and care. Get to know about the requirements of your kid and act accordingly to keep such undesirable occurrences away. If your child backchats, it would be wiser to keep your calm and find the cause instead of losing your temper. Once you learn why your child is reacting in such a way, it would be easier for you to find a solution.